watched a great documentary on charles bukowski and have gained a lot of inspiration from learning about him. he worked hard every day and wrote every night. he was also a misogynistic drunk- but the documentary put all that in perspective and conveyed how he was very human. anyway- the bit about how hard he worked at his day job and how he did his writing all the rest of the time hit home. it's where i've been for a long time. writing and creating on the weekends and evenings. sometimes i'm too tired for it- but i need to keep going anyway. there's fire inside me and i have to keep feeding it. the flames of creativity.
i had an intense dream a few nights ago. i woke up in the middle of the night and knew it was important that i remember it all, so i told it to my cat and instructed him not to let me forget. the dream was about how it doesn't matter if the machines/capitalism/patriarchy/anger/etc win. because as long as we're free, no one can take that away. real freedom is internal and real freedom is untouchable.